Monday, February 26, 2007

On Posting Personal Pictures (UPDATED)

The topic of parents posting pictures of their children on their blogs is pretty big in the mommy-and-daddy-blogger world. Some do it, others don't, and everyone has a strong opinion on it.

I have to say, given my nature to be so paranoid about everything, I'm constantly surprised whenever I hit the "publish" button on a post that has a picture of my boy. I don't know the statistics for what, if any, horrible things have happened to other families as a result of doing this, but some pretty crappy shit has happened in the past (there's too much on this topic to link to, plus, I'm not writing this to fan flames or bring up old shit), and considering the world we live in today, as a parent you have to stop and think before you do the seemingly harmless thing of sharing with your friends, family and the world your adorable child's fun day at the park. Because the next thing you know, your kid becomes the target of mean jokes at the hands of nasty, cruel adults; or you attract the attention of some sick-ass pedophile who ends up preying on your child; or what you think is just you writing about your life ends up being you giving stalkers, killers and creepy people a map to your home and habits. Think I'm exaggerating? Well, I don't. I don't put anyone above anything nowadays, and even seemingly innocent websites about family life are targets for whack-jobs and evil people.

So yeah, posting pictures doesn't always seem like the most brilliant move on my part, not even to me. So why do I do it? Why do I last like a week before I crack and post one up? I haven't been able to adequately express the reason why, and then I stumbled upon this post by Her Bad Mother. She captures my feelings perfectly, specifically the part about punctum, and how pictures help me capture all that is wonderful and quirky about my boy. Really, I can't put it any better myself, so you should go read it for yourself.

Even though I now have a way of verbalizing the reasons why I post pictures of my son (and myself and husband, too), I still vacillate. I still hesitate before hitting "publish". I still fear my son becoming a target and it being my fault. And yet, I maintain a belief in the power of images, in the way they can convey an emotion, event, or the essence of a human being so that you feel a direct connection with them - and that that transcends the bad things that can possibly happen. I think the images I use here enhance my writing without becoming the focus or being provocative in a negative way. And maybe one day, as my son grows older and life evolves and his need for privacy becomes more urgent, my feelings may swing more strongly in the other direction and his pictures will no longer appear here.

For now, though, I believe his images have that ability to puncture, and for that, they will remain.

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Update: Amanda shares her thoughts on the matter.

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Posted by Tere @ 2/26/2007   | |

4 Comments

  • Blogger Her Bad Mother posted at 2/26/2007 7:34 PM  
    I love that you had the response that you did to my post. I know exactly how you feel about the hesitancy, the second thoughts - I have them, too. But then (as you know) I'm overcome by the desire to share, to expose it all to the world, so that the world *will understand*.

    And for now, I'm going with that.

  • Blogger AmandaDufau posted at 2/26/2007 9:28 PM  
    I agree 100%. I am working on a post about this, it will be up momentarily.

  • Blogger mcewen posted at 2/26/2007 10:39 PM  
    We have the same debate. I was very cautious to begin with, but now I'm a bit more cavalier. I'm still uncertain whether I will regret later but......
    BEst wishes

  • Blogger AmandaDufau posted at 2/27/2007 12:02 PM  
    Thanks for the link love, my friend! =)

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