A Mom, a Blog, and the Life In-Between

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream - for Boobs!

I've posted this picture before; it is an image of my son Max, around 4 or 5 months old at the time, latched on to my breast, blissfully sucking his little heart away.

It is a picture that means a great deal to me: for one, I don't have a lot of good shots of Max nursing; for another, it is a visual reminder of a time in my life that was challenging and difficult at times, but also wonderful in the way it helped Max and me bond and helped me learn to understand and really know him.

I didn't *care* so much about breastfeeding until I realized how maligned it is and how the negative attitudes that pervade are based in large part on misinformation, ignorance and a general lack of support for women who choose to nurse. It is, to put it simply, unjust - and for that alone I am happy to take the right of women to breastfeed wherever and whenever they need to, as well as to be able to pump their milk when they return to work, as a cause worth fighting for.

I was lucky - my husband was beyond supportive: he was my cheerleader and helper and partner; my boss and co-workers respected my decision to pump and provided a lot of support and flexibility so that I could do it without a second thought; my family, long led by the example of my sister (who nursed her 3 kids), never once questioned or criticized my choice; and basically, I could give a shit what people think of me, so I nursed whenever and wherever I needed to without worrying what others might think of me because of it.

So no, I never personally suffered. But too many other women have, in both small and big ways. And the truth is, I may have yet another baby to breastfeed, and I have no way of knowing what kind of support I'll receive from my job when I request a longer leave or announce my intention to pump.

The shameful truth is that this country/society is incredibly backwards when it comes to maternity leave and supporting new moms. And this problem affects a woman's ability to breastfeed with a peaceful heart. Whether you stay at home or go back to work, you may at some point find yourself feeling ashamed or worried or sad or defeated - because your partner does not support you, or your family and friends roll their eyes or make comments when you pop the boob out, or you get kicked out of a restaurant for breastfeeding, or your daycare hassles you for proving pumped milk, or your company makes you feel alienated or unprofessional for pumping (or doesn't allow you to do it, period). I never forget that it might one day be me. It could also be you, or someone you love.

And even if it isn't - there is no good reason why a woman should feel shame or not be allowed to use her breasts to feed her baby. None. And I find it despicable that anyone - especially a loved one - would make a woman feel anything less than great for making that choice.

So today, I join in on the Great Breast Fest and add my voice to the many others who are making a very basic statement: breastfeeding is not gross or obscene, and every woman should have the right to nurse wherever and whenever necessary.

Labels: breast milk, breastfeeding, discrimination, lack of support, motherhood, politics

Posted by Tere @ 10/10/2007 | Permalink |

8 Comments

Jennifer Sprague, All Natural Mommies posted at 10/10/2007 3:11 PM
What a great picture. It's so wonderful you had so much support! :)

slouching mom posted at 10/10/2007 4:07 PM
That's a beautiful shot.

InTheFastLane posted at 10/10/2007 4:40 PM
That picture makes me miss my little ones.

Julie Pippert posted at 10/10/2007 5:27 PM
Aww, those sweet little round cheeks...little baby heads, all tucked in make me sort of miss it. What a sweet photo.

But as fore the attitude problems you describe? Supporting new mothers? AMEN!

Great post!

Julie
Using My Words

The Hen posted at 10/10/2007 10:04 PM
Ah, my dear husband did night feedings and lots of baby duty so I could pump -- which I did exclusively for nearly 8 months. How grateful I am he indulged my mania and my dedication. Makes me sad breastfeeding is a political and misunderstood issue.

AmandaDufau posted at 10/11/2007 8:36 AM
Another wonderful post. Thank you, T.

Freckle Face Girl posted at 10/11/2007 9:53 AM
Actually, my company was not supportive. I found that while people don't usually seem to be offended by breast feeding (breasts in general) in Miami; it isn't very common. Several people I knew there didn't do it because they didn't want to mess up their beautifully paid for breasts. When I went to the birthing class, girls were asking if there was a shot to dry up their milk. It is a great, but difficult cause. I believe I will have more success this time. :)

Heather posted at 10/11/2007 9:33 PM
I've been kicking myself because I never got a picture of either of my children at my breast. All of these pictures of babies nursing have been so beautiful!