Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Damned Cats

She is a nice lady. I feel obligated to state that because she is. She is friendly and chatty but not overly so, not knocking on my door or monopolizing my time when we're both outside and chat. She asks permission before entering my backyard to retrieve her grandson's ball, and she's repeatedly offered us use of her above-the-ground pool.

That said, she's driving me insane with her cats. Seriously, I'm about to lose it.

Before she moved in next door, there was no cat problem around here. There were a couple of strays that hung out toward the back of the yard, on the wall that borders another property, and it was no big deal. They kept to themselves and left my yard alone.

And then she moved in, and the problem began. All of a sudden, I noticed five, six cats, loitering in my back yard. Then, a terrible, sickening stench began to permeate through my front yard, and then the back. Cat poop. And then, on my porch - my porch! - cat pee. The smell of each of these is disgusting enough to make anyone want to vomit, and now they were seeping out of my property.

And then one day, chatting over the fence, she drops this gem: "I already have four cats inside the house, so I can't let these in, too. Besides, they're strays. I used to feed them at my old house, and when I left, I couldn't leave them behind. Who would feed them?"

This crazy-ass lady picked up the stray cats from her old neighborhood and set them loose in mine. She picked up a bunch of stray cats and moved them with her.

I was so shocked when she said that I was speechless. It took me a whole day to process that - did she really say she brought the stray cats with her? - so in the moment, I was just dumbstruck. Who the hell moves and brings the stray cats with them?! Don't people think about the nuisance they're unleashing on others? These cats have turned my yard into their toilet, and it's disgusting and frustrating! I've spread all kinds of concoctions - pepper, orange rinds, used coffee grounds - and nothing works. I bought the putrid spray that "guarantees" to drive them out, and it did not! Nothing drives them away! And with this heat, the stench of the crap is unbearable, and coupled with knowing that we can't freely enjoy the yard because a pile can be anywhere, I'm about to go nuts here. Oh, and one of the females has given birth - twice - in my yard, and another one might be pregnant. W.T.F.

I'm seriously at my wits' end with these damn cats. And I'm so mad at my otherwise-nice neighbor for bringing them here. It's so thoughtless; I can't wrap my mind around how a person could do something like this, let loose a bunch of filthy creatures so they become someone else's problem. Because she was worried over who would feed them? They're strays, they'll figure it out!

Meanwhile, I have a big, revolting problem on my hands, and I don't know what to do about it. I don't want to harm them, of course, but I really want them gone. GONE. I want my yard back! I want the stench gone!

Damn. these. friggin. cats.


Posted by Tere @ 6/08/2011   | |


  • Blogger Allen posted at 6/09/2011 9:18 AM  
    I'm glad you mentioned all the treatments that didn't work, because I'm in a similar situation and was about to try all of them. Since those didn't work, unless I get some new ideas my next steps are 1) buy some kind of sentry sprinkler that wets anything that walks by (it's expensive but painless) 2) if that doesn't work, buy a big cage, load it up with cat food and herd them up, once inside the cage drop them off somewhere far away, maybe at your house where they'll have friends ;) j/k
  • Blogger A Margarita posted at 6/09/2011 9:43 AM  
    Not having these cats spayed/neutered is irresponsible on your neighbor's part. Call me mean but I'd report her and the cats to authorities. Perhaps mention this to her before actually doing it so she has the chance to do something about them? Maybe I'm being harsh but I loathe cats.
  • Anonymous Anonymous posted at 6/09/2011 10:04 AM  
    This is all over Florida specifically Dade County...

    If all Your neighbors complain then animal service should show up and conduct an investigation. Have all neighbors concerned call 311 and file a complaint with the address of the CAT Lady Neighbor.....

    Citizens may lawfully place humane animal traps on their private property to capture any cats that may enter. However, if the cats are on private common grounds, the homeowners association would need to initiate the removal process.

    Trapped cats must be transported by the citizen to Animal Services. The animal is accepted without charge at the Animal Services shelter.
  • Anonymous Helenation posted at 6/09/2011 11:58 AM  
    How about suggesting to take them to a shelter? If she is so worried about who is going to feed them - they would be better off at a shelter than on the streets.
    As for the smell? Try NaturVet Yard Odor Killer - it is pretty good. Suerte!
  • Blogger Tere posted at 6/09/2011 12:05 PM  
    My biggest obstacle is that this lady considers them her pets. She brought them over, feeds them, has named them even, but they're let loose to roam all over my yard.

    So how can I get her to see that this is WRONG? It's not like she wants to get rid of them... I do!
  • Blogger CJ posted at 6/09/2011 12:58 PM  
    It sounds like a hording situation. She may have forty in there, for all you know! You can't get her to see it's wrong, it's an illness. I would do as the former commentor said and report it. It's not just the smell factor, but it's a HEALTH factor. That feces and urine contain diseases that are now seeping into your yard. Good luck!
  • Blogger Blue Wit posted at 6/10/2011 2:52 PM  
    OMG. I know you're going through something terrible here but that was just too funny. You should write in this style more often! And good luck with the cats.
  • Anonymous Anonymous posted at 6/16/2011 11:48 AM  
    I live in the cityof South Miami and have the same problem with my neighbor accross the street. His cats are all over my yard, my patio, using these areas for their toilet needs. I have called several agencies in Miami-Dade for help. I've only been offered to borrow a trap once I post a $50.00 refundable deposit; it would be my responsibility to bring the caught animals to any shelter of my choice. Like you I have tried every product ever believed to repell those pests. Nothing worked. There are strong laws in the book against dog owners, but nothing against cat owners.
  • Anonymous Anonymous posted at 6/16/2011 2:49 PM  
    Someone I know used to work with an organization call The Cat Network. Maybe they can help...
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